If you had to choose between the two, which would you prefer to be, accepting or content? You probably answered both, and that would undoubtedly be the ideal state. The fact is, not all of us are both and in the context of who it is that you have become, you are likely one or the other. Moreover, don’t be fooled, the two are not the same.
When in a group of people, whether at an event, waiting for a flight at an airport or dining in a restaurant, I have a habit of studying people (inconspicuously of course) and wondering what they are thinking and whether they are happy with their life. I have conducted a significant amount of self-evaluation, so it easy to also evaluate others. It isn’t a judgmental perspective that I take but more of a “I wonder how they are doing and what they are thinking right now” approach. I do this most of the time out of care and concern, though there are times when I am merely wondering why someone is behaving a certain way. We, humans, are amazing creatures and all unique, which makes us even more fascinating. Because we all have our nature, the way that we think, live and view the world around us can be completely different from anyone else.
If you are accepting of where you are in life you are amenable to it, thus you have reconciled that this is the way it is and will be and regard it as normal, suitable or usual. I recently participated in a sporting event where I observed other participants, not to understand their ability or skill but to determine if they were happy with life or wanting more. It was not only fascinating but touching to experience the communication, both verbal and non-verbal and the times of solitude of these individuals. Of course, my amateur psychologist came out (the coach in me) and I was compelled to engage as many people as possible during the time provided. I concluded that many people in that group are accepting of their lives. They have reconciled themselves with their place in life and viewed it as somewhere they will remain.
As a leader is some aspect of your life, be it family, volunteer, athletics, or work, are you accepting of where you are today? Have you reached your potential? Do you want to grow and be able to help others more effectively than you do today? Have you settled into your spot and accepted it as where you will remain?
Contentment is quite a different position. Being content is to be in a state of peaceful happiness. The key word there is peaceful. We could be in any circumstance, really, and be at peace. Another word that is used as a synonym to describe being content is satisfied. That one troubles me just a bit. When I think of satisfied I think of a temporary state since satisfaction for me is different from being content and occurs when something has been accomplished but fades when I aim at the next target. You might say that I am content while never permanently satisfied. What does that mean to you?
If you are a leader of a sales team, for example, how long can you remain satisfied? Usually, salespeople are not satisfied for long because, at the beginning of each year when their new quota is issued, they are at 0% attainment. Trust me; there is no satisfaction in 0% attainment! However, at year’s end, if you are at 125% of quota, you will likely be gratified until the new year begins and a new target provided. However, you can still be content with a 0% achievement status, if your sales success doesn’t define who you are as a person. You and I both know people, and I was once one of them, whose success is a high priority. So much so, when asked about themselves, they always talked about their job as if it was who they are versus what they do. For example, I was a Vice President and General Manager at one company. Alternatively, today, if I described myself the same way, I would be the CEO of 220 Cornerstone. Instead, I choose to tell people that I help businesses and individuals grow and become better by adding value to them and their organizations. See the difference?
You may work for a company that provides rewards, awards, special recognition or other accolades to employees to recognize achievement, efforts and to help motivate them. Those things are all good and satisfying to the recipients. However, what if you work in an environment that has no need, room, funding or impetus to bestow such glory? Can you still find contentment with who you are in your role, or do you merely have to accept that it is as it is?
When I think of these words, accepting and content other words come to mind. I believe that is so because I am continuously seeking to improve and take a mostly specific approach in attempting to accomplish getting more valuable. These words all begin with the letter “e” for some reason and represent a methodology for growth. Hopefully, you can gain some insight into your situation by reviewing these and perhaps in whatever organization, professional, social, family or volunteer that you are in you will be able to inject new life and some advantage into the journey.
When you begin any growth process, stepping into the environment should be done with eyes wide open as the most evident truths are those uncovered and unprotected. Knowing where you are, provides a firm foundation from which to build. Using the open eyes to examine your circumstances will provide clarity and perhaps allow you to evaluate the situation more objectively so that you are not developing and then executing a plan that is leading you in the wrong direction. I learned years ago that being an external thinker was important when setting a course for growth because it took me and us out of our own space and provided insight from other places outside of ourselves and reality to our understanding and actions.
When you create a roadmap, it isn’t the end of the thoughtfulness needed for advancement. Changes occur that require shifts in thinking and strategy, not to mention tactics. Plans are meant to evolve and not remain static. New evidence for needed adjustments, if seen with your open eyes will render the evolution of the construction of your highway leading to eventual success. If you follow this formula, you will earn your way to a new place in your life or organization. Along the way, you will find that you can be content while not being accepting and you will continuously grow and stretch to get to a location where you haven’t before reached.